By Sarah Menke, MDiv, BCC
Amidst the back-to-school buzz, college move-in days, the summer vacations coming to an end, and waiting (sometimes impatiently) for cooler fall days, August is often a month of transition. In all hustle and bustle of this month, something else is happening, too. August is National Grief Awareness Month. Grief is one of the universal experiences of what it is to be human, to love and to experience the pain that comes when we lose someone we love. Though it is something that no one will escape this life without experiencing, though it is a common and shared experience, its prevalence doesn’t make it any less painful, difficult, and often isolating to navigate.
Grief isn't a single emotion, but rather a web of intermingled emotions that can hold everything from sadness, anger, relief, guilt, even joy. What is felt in a given moment or a given day can vary widely, which can make it difficult to know how to best support someone who is grieving. Sometimes, we can put our own expectations on someone else's grief, expecting them to "get over it already" or "move on." But the reality is, grief is something that we carry with us throughout our lives. The vessel we carry it in may change in size or weight over time, but the grief stays with us, the love stays with us.
This month, you can honor Grief Awareness Month by reaching out to someone who you know is grieving. It's ok to feel like you don't have the right words, but a simple message of "thinking about you today" goes a long way. You can also honor your own grief by sharing a story of someone you have loved and lost, or by doing something that you enjoyed doing with your person like baking the cookies they always made.
In the busyness of this month, perhaps there is an invitation, too, to slow down and remember the stories that are being carried around us that we don't fully know. Grief goes to school, to and from vacation, to new jobs, and into the changing seasons. May we take time to honor our own grief, and in doing so, empower ourselves to honor the grief of those we encounter each day.
Sarah Menke serves as a full-time chaplain to support staff, their families, and the people we serve.
